September 19, 2021
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Are Women Less Entitled Than Men?

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When today’s guest, Eleanor Beaton, introduced me to something called “the entitlement gap” – I nearly threw my fancy teacup out the window in a rage. Y’all know I will break my toes before I tiptoe around any issue that involves equality. Women work so damn hard to close the wage gap, and now we have to make a damn scene to close this entitlement gap, too. 

You know me – I’m out to close all the gaps. Spoiler alert: I’m even writing a book on it. 

In this episode, you’ll learn to slam the door on this mess of inequality using the wise words of Eleanor Beaton. She’s a CEO, coach, writer, host of the Power + Presence + Position podcast, and mom. As the founder of SafiMedia, Eleanor is committed to advancing global gender equity through women’s entrepreneurship. Eleanor is on a mission to double the number of women entrepreneurs who scale past $1M in revenue by 2030. 

Eleanor and I go way back, and she’s a shining example of what you can do to succeed as a coach with a powerful mission.

What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • Learn why many women entrepreneurs struggle to scale.
  • A shocking story about a time Eleanor (literally) lost her voice.
  • Why your definition of success might be hindering your growth and how to shift your perspective.
  • The power of indignation and how to use it to close the entitlement gap.
  • Why constant dissatisfaction and “never enough-ness” is letting the patriarchy win.
  • How to prioritize yourself, especially when you’re busy growing a business.

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

HOT ANNOUNCEMENTS

If you’re a coach, consultant, or service-based entrepreneur and want to finish 2021 strong AF — get your booty to our FINISH STRONG event, October 1-3! You can join us in person in Evansville, Indiana, or buy a virtual seat. Grab your ticket here

If you’re running a coaching practice or service-based business and want to earn $100k and beyond, check out our ON THE SIX mastermind

Full Episode Transcript:

Susan Hyatt:

Welcome to the Rich Coach Club, the podcast that teaches you how to build your dream coaching practice and how to significantly increase your income. If you're a coach and if you're determined to start making more money, this show is for you. I'm master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I am psyched for you to join me on this journey.

Susan Hyatt:

Hey, coaches! Today's podcast guest, Eleanor Beaton, introduced me to an eye-opening report by The Female Lead. The report is entitled The Unentitled Mindset. The report explores why women still, in 2021, have not achieved equality in the workplace. The big issue the report discovered is something called the unentitled mindset, meaning that women are conditioned to feel less entitled than men, in all areas of their lives, leading to a severe lack of confidence when asking for what they want. Specifically, the report found that women often feel they should expect less, not take up too much space, not demand more, even when they deserve it.

Susan Hyatt:

Now, I've talked about this many, many times, but y'all know I will break my toes before I tiptoe around any issue that involved equality for women. We're all working so damn hard to close the wage gap, and now I guess we have to deal with this entitlement gap, too? Let me throw the middle finger at that cause. I'm up for the challenge. If you want to slam the door on this entitlement mess, you'll love my conversation with Eleanor in this episode.

Susan Hyatt:

Before we launch into that, let's talk about some things you can do this week to close the entitlement gap, the wage gap, the leisure gap, and more gaps that women face. Let's get into it.

Susan Hyatt:

I can't talk about closing gaps unless I first touch on power. Personally, I define power as a connection to self. If you know who you are and understand what your values are and develop the courage to express yourself in the world, there's no greater power than that. But there's also societal power. That's important for women to have, in order to create change and equality. We need a seat at the table. We need to help elect officials that will advocate for us or campaign to become officials, ourselves. We need to build companies and hire other women. We need to start foundations to fund the causes we believe in. The more power we have, the more we can flex on the patriarchy. Yaas!

Susan Hyatt:

One bold move to make in accomplishing this is to close the gaps. Let's walk through three gaps that you can begin to close right away. The workload gap. The invisible workload is all the extra work that women put on their shoulders, to make sure the household runs smoothly and other people are safe, nurtured and comfortable. You can begin to close this workload gap by becoming aware of the moments when you take on the extra work at home. Assign the extra work to your partner and kids, and they can figure it out. They should be doing just as much invisible labor as you do.

Susan Hyatt:

The opportunity gap. Did you know that not long ago only 3% of advertising creative directors were women, and even less were women of color? This stat has now raised to 29% after tireless work over a decade, by the 3% Conference organization. Are you effing kidding me? Still only 29%, in 2021. The ad industry that greatly influences our entire society is out here acting like they're still living in the Mad Men era. It's bullshit.

Susan Hyatt:

This isn't an isolated statistic. Many industries have minimal opportunities for women's advancement and even less for women of color. We can close this opportunity gap by giving the middle finger to our respective industries and start our own companies. Hire women. Promote women. Snatch all the women clients away from the bros. Watch that gap swing to a close.

Susan Hyatt:

The voice gap. Women are taught to sit back, stay quiet, and not ruffle feathers. Not on my watch. Not in my world. I've had to do a lot of work to get here, though. If we want to be heard, we've got to make a scene. Make a loud, effing messy scene. Stand up. Speak out, not cower. If you see something that you don't like, I encourage you to take brave, unapologetic action to correct it.

Susan Hyatt:

Now, at the University for Life Coach Training, which I founded, we definitely dive deep into the subconscious and understanding where all this program took place, the origins for us, whether it's family origin or culture at large or probably both, that installed that kind of programming. I hope at least this little pep talk gave you some ideas on closing these gaps for yourself and women everywhere. It's time to close those gaps for good.

Susan Hyatt:

Side note: I'm working on a book that shows how all this is related, how our worthiness is related to the confidence gap, the wage gap, the entitlement gap, the leisure gap. I'm out to close the gaps.

Susan Hyatt:

All right, it's time for community wins. Yay! This is the part of the show where I share wins and victories and beautiful accomplishments from either clients or members of the Go Time Facebook group, or even people inside on the Six Mastermind, or my higher level mastermind. I bragged about this person before, but it's very timely to talk about Angela Mascenik again today.

Susan Hyatt:

This is an old brag. The reason I'm bringing it up again is because you may not know this, but unless you've been living under a rock, you probably have heard about my Finish Strong event that's happening October 1st through the 3rd. Now, there are live in-person tickets available, but there are also virtual tickets available. As we all know, last year in 2020, Finish Strong had to be all one hundred percent virtual, due to COVID. Angela was an attendee last year for Finish Strong, the virtual conference.

Susan Hyatt:

What she did to make it special for herself was, she booked an Airbnb. She took her crown with her, and she really created the space to have a beautiful weekend, where she could really dive in, learn, absorb what I was teaching. What she reported back was, live, during the conference, I encouraged her to raise her rates and also make her rates public.

Susan Hyatt:

There's always a lot of debate between marketing consultants around should I publish my prices or should I have sales calls and reveal my pricing after somebody asks. I am a huge fan of making your pricing public, for a variety of reasons. I just think it's, for me, as a consumer, I don't want to have to ask you how much something is. I really want to know. I'm all for transparency.

Susan Hyatt:

During the Finish Strong conference, Angela sent out an email to her entire list with published rates. She also announced a mini challenge, after learning about how to host a mini challenge from me. She made that quarter $100,000. It was her first six figure quarter. She definitely attributes it to what she learned during Finish Strong. Congratulations, Angela.

Susan Hyatt:

I happen to know that after that, she then joined my higher level mastermind, and her success ... I mean, I think she actually just reported inside the Facebook group that she made like 50-something thousand dollars in four days. So, this stuff works. If you're interested in attending Finish Strong, we're going to put all the details in the show notes. Get you a ticket, whether virtual or live. Like Angela, many people who attended raved about that event, made more money than ever, and I want to help you do the same.

Susan Hyatt:

Oh, now it's time for an amazing interview with my friend and colleague Eleanor Beaton. Eleanor is an amazing entrepreneur, who I had the pleasure to get to know years ago, when she was in coach training. I have so enjoyed following her career ever since. She's the founder of SafiMedia, an education and coaching company for female entrepreneurs. She's also the host of the uber popular Power + Presence + Position podcast. She's just a delight.

Susan Hyatt:

She absolutely blew my mind wide open when talking about something she calls a jewel business model. It actually sparked so much creativity in me, this conversation, that it created the framework for a book I'm writing. Which, there will be more on that soon. I'll actually be teaching some of it at Finish Strong. Without further adieu, meet Eleanor.

Susan Hyatt:

Welcome to the show, Eleanor! I'm so happy to have you on Rich Coach Club.

Eleanor Beaton:

I am so psyched to be on the show. I love the show. I love you. We go way back. We can tell people a little bit about that in a moment, but I'm just delighted to be here.

Susan Hyatt:

We do go way back. I was so delighted to be on your show. We'll link to that in the show notes. I haven't been doing a ton of interviews this year, mostly because I've just been working on so many other things. Then just when I had the thought, "I need to get some good guests on this show," I got a pitch from your people. I was like, "Hot damn! We're going to have Eleanor on the show and talk about entitlement gap and y'all all stopping your hustle culture bullshit." She's got stats. Anytime I make these claims, somebody like Eleanor comes right behind me with the statistics to back it up. So I'm thrilled to have somebody on the show that knows what the hell they're talking about. Welcome.

Eleanor Beaton:

So good to be here. So good to be here.

Susan Hyatt:

So, we do go way back. From coach training, right?

Eleanor Beaton:

Yeah.

Susan Hyatt:

What year was that?

Eleanor Beaton:

Okay, so I'm going to say that was 2014. 2014, I think. I had been running a consulting business, and I just knew that I wanted to get into the coaching field. I signed up to do my certification, and my very first teacher was Susan. Here's the thing, you know what I mean? I remember. It was like, you know when you have these teachers and there's the technical part of what you were teaching about how to be a great coach, but there was also the example that you were setting. "Here's what's possible when you live this and when you become the woman who is capable of doing these things." That was such a huge moment. I was totally hooked and have basically been listening to your podcast and reading your blogs and the videos ever since. Yeah, just that sort of inspiration. So, we do go way back.

Susan Hyatt:

We do go way back. I think it is so important. With the University for Life Coach Training, right now we have our second group going through, and we're enrolling for the third group. I do think something that's important is to help coaches see examples of what is possible, what you could do with this coaching certification. Almost every single person who's brand new to life coaching is like, "Is this really a thing? Can I really do stuff with this? Is this a scam? What is happening?"

Susan Hyatt:

You obviously learned what you needed to learn and really took off with it. Talk to all the people about what you're doing right now and how you have evolved as a coach. I think all of the coaches listening love to hear stories about what people have done since graduation.

Eleanor Beaton:

Basically, when I got certified initially as a coach, and I was coaching before I was certified. Just so y'all know, do not let anything stop you. I had been doing a lot of consulting. Then as soon as I started gathering more skills, I just started weaving those skills into the work that I was doing. My consultant clients were asking me did I do coaching. I knew from the very beginning the chances were strong I wanted to work with women leaders and women entrepreneurs. That was mostly what I knew, that I wanted to work with women. 90% of the work that I've done has been with women.

Eleanor Beaton:

I was advising them and coaching them on leadership. Initially, I was working with mid-level leaders, entrepreneurs, senior level leaders. I didn't really have a niche, originally. I was, in your words, coaching my face off. I remember you saying, "Look, you've got to coach your face off, to figure out who you want to work with." Right?

Susan Hyatt:

Yes!

Eleanor Beaton:

So, I did that. My very first career was a freelance journalist, so I was used to pitching myself. I was used to selling. I know you come from the world of real estate. I had these skills that I could take into coaching. I was working with women leaders, and I was part of hustle culture. After a while, of blogging and speaking, that's what I did to build my business, I blogged, and I spoke, and sometimes I'd speak for free and sometimes I got paid. I didn't care. I was like, "I'm going to get in front of people."

Eleanor Beaton:

It took me probably about a year, and then I was fully booked with one-on-one clients. There is no exhaustion like the exhaustion of coaching 30 clients in a week, one on one, for me. I was like, "Things have got to change. I'm not [crosstalk 00:15:40]."

Susan Hyatt:

Wait, wait, wait. You were coaching six clients a day, Monday through Friday?

Eleanor Beaton:

I was. Oh, girl. Yes I was. I was coaching my face off, and I was coaching my muffin top on. Okay? I wasn't moving. I was glued. Now, I don't look back on that with regret, because I learned. You know what I mean? I practiced the skills. I learned. I was closing sales. I was working with clients, learning what I loved to do, my process, my methodology. But I was just like, "I can't do this."

Susan Hyatt:

Oh, I bet you were! 30 clients a week? Woo. You've got to know some stuff, 30 clients a week.

Eleanor Beaton:

Girl, I know. Right. I was just here for it. I was here for it. I can remember reading ... You know Liz Gilbert, Eat Pray Love?

Susan Hyatt:

Yeah.

Eleanor Beaton:

She's this amazing food journalist. I remember her writing, it was a food article, but she was talking about how she became a well-known food journalist. She was like, "When life threw hoops at me, I just gamely jumped through them." That's how I learned. I was just going to gamely jump through, but that wasn't sustainable.

Eleanor Beaton:

Then I realized, "Okay, I need to bring more focus. I need to bring more focus. I need to start really uncovering what is my process and methodology." I started packaging that into programs and then growing with programs. I still do one-on-one. I love one-on-one work.

Susan Hyatt:

Me too.

Eleanor Beaton:

So I still do a little bit of it. But yeah, that's how I scaled. Today I only work with female entrepreneurs.

Susan Hyatt:

Through working with female entrepreneurs, what have you noticed?

Eleanor Beaton:

Oh my gosh. I would say the big thing that I've noticed is that you won't scale the business you don't want to scale.

Susan Hyatt:

Say more.

Eleanor Beaton:

What I have noticed, I noticed this first in myself and I certainly noticed this in working with other women entrepreneurs, I think there's a small percentage of women entrepreneurs who are just marketing beasts. They just get it. They just one hundred percent get it. They understand how to put together home run offers. They're just out there, doing their thing.

Eleanor Beaton:

I think most of us have a more nuanced reason for getting into business. I think a lot of us value freedom and independence. I think about in terms of CIA: cash, influence, and autonomy. Honestly, I find that it's influence and autonomy often comes first, and the cash is the vehicle for all of that.

Eleanor Beaton:

What I noticed is that, for women entrepreneurs who were building hustle-based businesses, business where, to scale, to sell more was going to make their lives a lot more painful, a lot more difficult, it was going to take them away from things rather than adding to things, they were not necessarily able to scale their businesses. They kept blaming things like marketing, or maybe I don't have the right offer, or maybe I'm pricing my offer wrong. The reality was that they weren't good with it, internally. They needed to create an offer or a business that felt good to scale.

Eleanor Beaton:

That's what I started noticing. I certainly experienced that myself, that every time I've taken an external leap in the business it's because something internal had to shift. It had to be aligned. I had to be able to visualize the growth. To burrow more, it had to feel like shackles off. It had to feel good and free, in order to experience that growth. That's what I've totally noticed. Does that relate to you?

Susan Hyatt:

Yeah. I totally get what you're saying. If you want to scale something, there is always a way to do that. It can become, quote/unquote, hard, like what you're saying, when you're not totally at peace with it. Often, I do find that often there is some barrier in the mind that, "Oh, if this actually scales, then there's some scary thought, belief around time, wealth, or lack of it." Or losing something, whether it's time or connection or peace or, fill in the blank. There have been plenty of times, even in my own career, where it's like having this belief that, "Well, if I do this, then this bad thing is going to happen." Not even consciously. It is interesting.

Eleanor Beaton:

Right? The other thing that happened to me, and this is so interesting, I remember as I was scaling my business ... You can go back and you can see. It's just like I have kids. They go through growth spurts. You're just kind of going, and then all of a sudden there's a spurt. You know? I was going through a growth spurt. I had this event. This was back when I thought the only way to make an offer for a higher ticket coaching package was to have a big, expensive event.

Susan Hyatt:

Oh right, because that was a thing.

Eleanor Beaton:

That was a thing!

Susan Hyatt:

That was a thing.

Eleanor Beaton:

Oh my gosh. It's just so cute that I thought that. So you go into this event. It was so expensive. That was all good. I was here for it. I sold more tickets to the event than I thought I was going to. I remember walking into the room. This was the way, this is so cute and funny now, but everybody was on their feet clapping. Then the doors open, I walk up through the middle, like I'm a bride. Except there's no music. They're all just clapping for me.

Eleanor Beaton:

I'm walking in. It's so exciting. I looked out over the crowd, and I didn't recognize people. There were a lot of people in the room that I had never seen before. All of sudden I realized that my outside had outpaced my inside. I felt so vulnerable. I felt all of a sudden the existence of this power that I didn't realize I had. It was kind of an out of body experience.

Eleanor Beaton:

Later that day, I start to get a sore throat. Susan, I lost my voice on day one of a three day event that people flew in for.

Susan Hyatt:

What? [inaudible 00:22:22].

Eleanor Beaton:

Okay?

Susan Hyatt:

[inaudible 00:22:24]. I am here for this story. Okay.

Eleanor Beaton:

Oh my god. So I am just horrified. One of the women that's there is a voice coach, and she's like, "There's no physical reason for you to have lost your voice." I'm there. You know every woman in that room is looking at me like, "Girl." It was just so stressful, but it was such a powerful moment because I really realized, "Hey, number one, it's okay. You're totally fine. Also, there's some inner work to do here, to be ready for growth and to be ready for power." Right?

Susan Hyatt:

Be ready for power.

Eleanor Beaton:

Because if you look at classical culture like ancient Greek and Roman art, when they depict women who are powerful, typically being powerful meant having a voice. What would happen when a woman decried people who attacked her or spoke up for her husband who's out in battle, she would literally get her tongue ripped out. That was what would happen. This is shown in art. It has always been unsafe for women to have a voice and be powerful. I think that's a legacy that we still live with, on this sort of subconscious level. Yeah, so I had to get good with that, in order to scale. I also had to get good-

Susan Hyatt:

Wait!

Eleanor Beaton:

Yeah?

Susan Hyatt:

How did the event wrap up? How did you-

Eleanor Beaton:

Oh my lord. Do you really want to know?

Susan Hyatt:

Yeah, how did you do days two and three with no voice?

Eleanor Beaton:

Okay, so, day two and three. Basically I had a team, and there was a lot of writing things on cards. My sister was there with me. She was like, "Eleanor, you'd better pay for my wardrobe because I am sweating through every dress I own right now." She was so stressed. I had to have team members go up and do presentations. They didn't know the content. They were trying their best.

Eleanor Beaton:

Then I decided, because I was in the hole from this event, I had somebody who came. She was going to do a presentation. She was going to do a sales presentation. I was like, "Can you make the offer for this event?" Now, god love her because there's not many people who would have said yes. I don't even know why. I was in panic ... I was just like, "I have to make money. I need to make an offer." That was the stress I felt I was under. So she did.

Eleanor Beaton:

It was not a good offer. It was really, really not a good offer. It was bad. It was bad, okay? People were like, "Is this a timeshare offer?" Oh my gosh. So that's what happened. I'm going to tell you-

Susan Hyatt:

Did you sell any offers?

Eleanor Beaton:

I sure did! You bet your butt. I totally sold them. I think it was because people had been following my podcast and my work from before. So, I did sell. Did I sell as many as I would have, had I made the offer? Oh, hell no. But I totally made money. We profited well from the event. I really learned a ton of lessons, about systems and processes, but also this big personal lesson about, "Hey, you've got to pay attention." You know what I mean? You'd better be lined up for this. It was literally, to this day, I'm going to say it ranks ... It's up there in probably the top two bad experiences, maybe top three. It was tough. It was tough, it was humiliating, it was embarrassing, and so revealing. Now I look back. I just think that girl who did that was so tough.

Susan Hyatt:

Totally! Total bad ass, that just continued with the event, did the best she could, got somebody else to pitch the offer. I mean, what else are you going to do? I think that it is interesting, when you think about losing your voice. That realization that you had, that you're outsides had outpaced your insides? Holy shit. Amazing. Amazing. Have you ever had the opposite, where you felt like your outsides didn't match?

Eleanor Beaton:

Yeah, totally. I've definitely had that. Part of that has come from where my insides have outpaced my outside. That happened definitely, I would say, sort of at the beginning of my coaching career. I felt very clear about the benefit I could offer, but I didn't feel as confident in my ability to sell it, or my ability to market it as clearly as I wanted to. I didn't feel as confident in my ability to charge what I wanted to. All of that ended up sorting out.

Eleanor Beaton:

Later in my career as an entrepreneur, I noticed that I was starting to really see some problems, I guess, in terms of how we talk to, about, and with women entrepreneurs. I started noticing how ... There were a couple things. What I started really seeing was how we define success, as a business. Typically, we define success in business as more every year, more revenue, more profit. Of course, that's growth. Really, there's no amount of growth that's enough, you know? I started seeing this.

Eleanor Beaton:

I also started seeing how many of the women who start businesses, because there's a huge movement of women starting businesses, close to 1900 women per day in the United States will open a business.

Susan Hyatt:

Right, amazing.

Eleanor Beaton:

Huge, right? It's anywhere from two to five times higher than the national average, depending on what research you're looking at. This has been going on for close to 10 years. Women are really leaving corporate structures, starting their own businesses. Why? Not necessarily because they see an opportunity in the marketplace that they need to fill and exploit, but because they really see ... I think many of us see the opportunity for freedom. We don't want to be part of these old structures, so we're going to remake business.

Eleanor Beaton:

So, these two things are happening. I'm seeing this happening. I'm seeing how all of the business books on my shelf, most of them are written by men. They all assume this model of what success should look like. I had totally bought into that, myself. I didn't know there was an alternative. That's when I started seeing, "Wow, I think there's another way to look at business growth."

Eleanor Beaton:

I started thinking about that and writing about that and talking about that. Because it wasn't fitting in to this conventional, bigger every year, higher all the type, never enough, it felt as though that wasn't ... I was like, "This idea is powerful." This concept of women reshaping the narrative of what growth can and should look like, this is powerful. So many women entrepreneurs will benefit from this. But I felt like the outside, the marketplace maybe wasn't ready to hear it or benefit from it, to the degree that I thought they should.

Eleanor Beaton:

That has totally happened as well. That's like, "How do you share a new concept or an idea with a marketplace?" I had to learn how to do that. That has happened, too. My inside, I was like, "Oh, I'm just not going to stress." Not in a let the angels take care of me, but you know what I mean? I'm going to grow from a place of sufficiency, no matter what. I'm going to make sure that the means justify the end, versus the other way around.

Susan Hyatt:

So good! When you're talking with a female entrepreneur who is really mired in the old, that success is bigger every year, what do you say?

Eleanor Beaton:

Ooh, yeah.

Susan Hyatt:

How do you shift that perspective, whether it's speaking from the stage or your podcast or writing about it?

Eleanor Beaton:

I really struggled with that, for a couple of different reasons. One was that, how do you question what we've never really thought to question before, or the suit that we're swimming in?

Eleanor Beaton:

Here's how I really arrived at a way to talk about it in a compelling way. It was through the power of indignation. I know you're all about making a scene. Indignation, feeling indignant about something, is such a constructive emotion.

Eleanor Beaton:

I'm on the board of two venture capital type organizations. It's really interesting. That whole model is very different. You invest money into tech-backed businesses, typically to make them really grow. The goal is to create unicorn businesses, a business that has a billion dollar valuation. Across the world, so much money is poured into founders, typically guys, their dreams of building a unicorn business. In that culture of entrepreneurship, having a lifestyle business is like ... You know how in the South ... You're from the South. You know how you guys say, "Bless your heart?"

Susan Hyatt:

Oh yeah.

Eleanor Beaton:

But it's actually not a nice thing.

Susan Hyatt:

Right.

Eleanor Beaton:

Calling a business a lifestyle business in that culture, it's the same thing. it's like, "Oh, whatever, sweetheart. Go sit in the corner. It's not a real business."

Susan Hyatt:

Right.

Eleanor Beaton:

I was like, "Oh my gosh, these businesses are employing people, they're making a difference." But those tech founders, most of whom will fail, they know they are building something that has a recognized name. They know it's a thing. It's called a unicorn business. I was like, 'What about the rest of us, who are not building, who don't have a desire to build a business that has a billion dollar valuation? What are we building?"

Eleanor Beaton:

That's when I created a concept called the jewel business. A jewel business is a kind that I think many service-based women are actually building. It follows the 30/30/30. They are basically driving top line growth by 30% or more. They are generating a 30% profit margin, so they can grow without having to need outside capital to build up cash reserves. And the founder herself has 30% open time.

Eleanor Beaton:

Now all of a sudden, there's a name. That ambition can be, that whole thing, there's never enough, it's like, "No, here's a model of growth." It's 30/30/30. You can grow more than 30%, for sure, but are you also valuing open time and profits? It was just about kind of creating mental models and growth models that can pose an alternative to other models of growth that are named. Guys, patriarchal culture is really good at creating something, naming it, and calling it the gold standard. Right?

Susan Hyatt:

A hundred percent. Oh my god. Yes!

Eleanor Beaton:

So, we need to do that, too.

Susan Hyatt:

I love this! The jewel business. What do you think, for yourself and for others that you've coached, is their biggest objection to the jewel business model?

Eleanor Beaton:

This is so interesting. It's the growth rate.

Susan Hyatt:

Ah.

Eleanor Beaton:

The growth rate, that's the main thing that I hear people objecting to. It's this idea that either it's too little or it's too much. It's this idea of actually setting a number around growth, you know what I mean? What can that look like?

Eleanor Beaton:

The thing is, this model, it's really designed for women who are running service-based or expertise-based businesses. Which, quite frankly, is the majority of new female-owned startups. They're in the service industries or knowledge-based. The biggest problem everybody experiences, I don't know if you're seen this, you talk to a woman entrepreneur, you talk to 10 women entrepreneurs, and I'm going to be that about eight of them will be disappointed in their results over the last year. Even when you start to look and quantify the results, and you show them the results, and they're like, "Wow, I'm actually pretty proud of myself. Wow, I didn't realize I accomplished that." That's what happens, when your idea of growth is never enough. You're just constantly dissatisfied.

Susan Hyatt:

And it's never enough because?

Eleanor Beaton:

Yeah.

Susan Hyatt:

Where does that come from, the never enough-ness?

Eleanor Beaton:

I think the never enough-ness truly is a function of living in a patriarchal society, with a patriarchal growth model. Listen, I am all about the environment. The UN came out with their climate report. It's pretty dire.

Susan Hyatt:

Yeah.

Eleanor Beaton:

I think what we're seeing is, our models of growth are built around more is always better and there's never enough. That's just the way it is. This comes out of a great book called The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist, by the way.

Susan Hyatt:

Oh, I read that years ago.

Eleanor Beaton:

So good. So good.

Susan Hyatt:

Yeah. I forgot about that book. Yeah.

Eleanor Beaton:

But that's where it comes from. This model of growth where it is never enough and you constantly have to acquire more, I see that as sort of the pervading belief around how you actually grow things.

Eleanor Beaton:

What I have found is that, me personally ... And I lived that. The challenge was, I remember being like, "I just have to get my business to seven figures. I just have to get my business to seven figures. When I do, I'm going to be different. It just is such an important milestone." I got there, and I was like, "Oh, okay. This is great. I'm really proud of myself. But not all that much changed. It's great. I have way better clothes, and this is really fun." There was a lot of very practical things that were awesome, but I was also like, "There's got to be more than this?" You know what I mean? There was this weird sense of disillusionment.

Eleanor Beaton:

That's where I realized that underneath ambition is desire. Ambition says more is always better. Desire says, "Here's what I really want to create." Now, the irony is, your business, I think, when you are growing from that place of sufficiency, you feel better. You're more in tune with yourself. You only do the things that you really want to do. Actually, your business grows a lot more than that. It was weird. By sort of shooting for a lower growth target, I found I ended up growing more. Because I was aligned with it, you know?

Susan Hyatt:

Right. I think it's so interesting. I love hearing the way that you talk about it. I talk a lot about pleasure over willpower, and the more fun I have, the more money I make, that being a real barometer for me. Time, wealth, and pleasure and fun are as important to me as revenue. It's interesting. I agree with you. When I had seven figures, too, I was like, "Oh, my shoes are better. I can go on these trips."

Eleanor Beaton:

Right?

Susan Hyatt:

"It's awesome that I can pay for college and stuff like that." But in terms of, I'm the same. I'm the same person. There's a lot you can do with wealth. There's a lot you can do with money, but if it's going to require not being able to sleep at night, I'm out. I think that a lot of female entrepreneurs fall into that. That's why I was curious, where do you think this ... I agree. I think the never enough-ness comes from the patriarchy. I do agree, myself included, I'm somebody who I'm like, "Celebrate everything. Make sure you recognize all the things you're doing."

Susan Hyatt:

Yet, I can find myself, as well, I had no idea until I really looked at the numbers with my accountant that 2020, it was such a difficult year for so many reasons, COVID and things with my team, it was our highest earning revenue year yet. It didn't feel like that, at all. I was like, "What?" I was like, "What a shithole of a year." My accountant was like-

Eleanor Beaton:

2020 was-

Susan Hyatt:

Oh man. I mean, because so much of our marketing plan was to be live. We had a series of small live events that were going to be part of an overall marketing plan. Luckily, I've been working online for years. It was just like, the whole plan out the window. Anyway, all that to say, I was like, "Oh." It's not more revenue, at all, that is what is so delightful. It's got to be paired with a lot of other things, for me to care.

Eleanor Beaton:

Totally. To care. Listen, don't get me wrong. I love money. I love building personal wealth. I think what it allows you to do and the freedom, there's definitely a certain amount of freedom that it creates. This isn't the don't make money show. It's not that.

Susan Hyatt:

Right, no. We like money.

Eleanor Beaton:

You know what I mean? We love money. But it is this idea that, again, I think in a patriarchal society, the end always justifies the means. Anytime that I have taken on a patriarchal system, it has been because I disagreed that the means justified the ends. I disagreed that any end could justify means to get there. That's hustle culture. Hustle culture is the epitome of, "Hey, the end justifies the means. Do whatever you need to do to get there." I did some of that. I coached 30 clients a week. I totally did that. I'm like, "You know what? And now I'm here. That's just never going to happen again."

Susan Hyatt:

Right.

Eleanor Beaton:

It's never going to happen. I'll give you a super practical tip, because sometimes people are like, "Okay, Eleanor, can you bring this to earth?" This is really funny and practical. When I was in that culture, when I was in hustle culture, everything came second to ambition and to what I wanted to create. I would be sitting my butt down to do those calls, back to back, and then hours would pass and I'd realize, "I need to pee. Get out of my way. I'm going to break down the door to the bathroom, if anybody's in there. I'm super thirsty. I haven't eaten lunch."

Eleanor Beaton:

Basically what was happening is, what are you doing? You're making an enemy of yourself. Then I was like, "Okay, we're not doing that anymore." It's probably your fun has to come first. I'm going to be there for myself. I'm going to look after myself, no matter what. I will pause calls. I take it really seriously, maybe a little extreme. I will pause calls and be like, "Guys, it's great. I just need to pause. I need to take a bio break." I will just never not honor my physical self. That type of attitude, you know what I mean? Now growth is a good thing because I never have to come second to it. You know?

Susan Hyatt:

I love that! Tons of clients that I work with ... I once had a client who was in middle, pretty high up but middle management for a corporation. She was scared to take bio breaks. Eleanor, she was peeing in a Tupperware cup, in her office. Did I tell you that story when I was on your podcast?

Eleanor Beaton:

No. No. Oh my gosh.

Susan Hyatt:

She had one of those jumbo Tupperware cups, I kid you not, and was peeing in it, instead of taking the time to go down the hall and go to the bathroom. I shit you not. I was like, "Listen, here's what we're not ..." Her homework assignment was to throw that away. So she started taking bathroom breaks. She started telling her boss, "These are the meetings I'm available for. These are the meetings I can't, because I can't get my job done if I ..." Once she started, like you're saying, putting herself above growth, for the company, not even her own, she got promoted. She started making even more money, because she was going for walks on her lunch break and-

Eleanor Beaton:

Actually peeing in the ladies' room.

Susan Hyatt:

Listen, if I didn't know so many women who consistently hold their need to pee in order to do work, I wouldn't believe it. But I totally believe it. I've talked to so many people. I've done that myself, holding it.

Eleanor Beaton:

Yep, but that's the thing, right? Here's the thing. I don't think for a second that Halliburton or Exxon or even Apple are going to disrupt established growth models in order to pursue a different philosophy of growth. I think women entrepreneurs will. When I look at things like what's happening with the environment, as an example, we do have to make changes, but it seems impossible when you have a growth model that growth is more and profits come first. I think when women entrepreneurs are like, "Why are we really doing this? What do we want to create in the world?" Of course a successful business, but I think women like you and I also show an example of, "Here's what success can really look like, and here's what we're not going to do." Even by holding these values like fun is important, fun is a growth principle, and growth actually is as important as cash. That's a very revolutionary concept in the world of business, you know?

Susan Hyatt:

It totally is. I brought my workaholic tendencies, like you did, into the beginning of my coaching business. I remember being like, "Wait a minute. I got into this business to have a life, and to help other people have a life." I want to say it was like eight, nine months in. I was like, "What's the opposite of what I'm doing?" It was the more fun I have, the more money I make. When I claimed that mantra, in the beginning, that was not my reality. I did set out to prove it true, and now it's like, "Well, of course. Absolutely not. I can't take any calls after 4:00. Absolutely not. I can't take any calls on Friday."

Susan Hyatt:

What's interesting, and I'm sure you see this too, of course you do, right now I'm working with a couple of different head hunters to fill a couple of different roles on my team. It is paramount that I fill these positions. One of the head hunters was like, "Well, she can meet on Friday, but I know you said you don't work on Fridays. She can meet on Friday." I was like, "Okay, but you're correct. I don't take meetings on Friday. So, Monday it is." It's like people are constantly butting up against that boundary because it's just not part of their lives. "What do you mean you won't take a meeting on a Friday, if this is important to you?" It's like, "I'm important to me."

Eleanor Beaton:

Yes. Yeah. It's like that, continuous. This is the thing, and this is why I think it's so important for women to have role models or colleagues or people who are exemplifying this and taking a stand for it. It's a little bit like the strength to continue saying, "No, no, no. See, actually, when I was saying that, it wasn't just for my health." Well, it was, but it's not just lip service. It's legit. That's who I am. Maintaining those boundaries and showing what it's like to create a business and life where they both go together, that's huge. There's just not a lot of examples of it, yet.

Susan Hyatt:

There's not. I love this jewel. I love that you named it a jewel-based business. I took so many notes. By the way, do you have one of these reMarkable pads?

Eleanor Beaton:

I have a reMarkable, but I haven't used it in forever.

Susan Hyatt:

I have the new one. I didn't try the old one, but I'm obsessed with it. I love to write things down. Even if I never look at it again, writing it down really helps me. I am going to flip back through these notes, because I have so many quotables. You're so smart.

Eleanor Beaton:

Same. I learned from the best.

Susan Hyatt:

Of course you know you are.

Eleanor Beaton:

Right?

Susan Hyatt:

You know you are. Enough about you. Tell me what you're super into right now and how people can best connect with you and learn more about what you're up to.

Eleanor Beaton:

Yeah, I love it. Right now I'm super into my podcast, which is called Power + Presence + Position, Scaling in Business and Life. That's one of the main things. I'm really doing a lot there and sharing a lot about this concept, of the jewel business model. I know that you loved that concept, but I'd love to share something around that, this idea of how do we take ideas ... So many of us in this business, we have these ideas. We have this stuff that we know.

Eleanor Beaton:

It's this idea of how do we take these things that we know and really make sure that we value them and that these things that we know and these ideas that we have, that we're giving them the respect they deserve? What do we do with things that we believe in, with things that are important and worthy? We name them. It's this idea of just naming things. I just really share that with people. Yeah, so that's what I talk a lot about, jewel businesses and how to build one, just different thoughts around that, in the podcast. That's what I'm super psyched and pumped about. That's probably the best place to go and hear more about that concept.

Susan Hyatt:

You've really got my gears going. I have so many things popping off in my brain, ideas. This was such a great conversation. I'm so grateful to have you come on and name that for us, and also to share your top three most embarrassing, hard, difficult business moments. I would love for people to share theirs. I have so many. I have so many. It's just for people listening to this podcast, sometimes it can feel, as you know, very lonely building a business and very isolating. To have someone come on and talk about a story like that is so helpful and so beneficial. I'm so appreciative of you.

Eleanor Beaton:

Thank you. Thank you.

Susan Hyatt:

Okay, one more thing before you go. The one gap women should not be talking about is thigh gap. Y'all, don't make me scream. Half our population is constantly being distracted from closing meaningful gaps because the patriarchy wants us to focus on slimming down and shrinking ourselves. Oh, hell no. Take up all the space. Get loud and proud. Don't let them distract you.

Susan Hyatt:

Thank you for listening to this episode of the Rich Coach Club podcast. I hope this episode has inspired you to create what you crave. Thanks for listening, and I'll see you next time.

 

Enjoy The Show?

XOXO,
Susan

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