Welcome to the Rich Coach Club, the podcast that teaches you how to build your dream coaching practice and how to significantly increase your income. If you're a coach and you're determined to start making more money, this show is for you. I'm master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I'm psyched for you to join me on this journey.
Hi coaches. I’ve got a question for you. Have you forgotten how to relax? Like, when was the last time you melted into a puddle of complete relaxation? No phone, no computer, no meetings, no emails. No urgent priorities.
And when’s the last time you had a truly relaxed mind and you allowed yourself to daydream and wonder and wander? And I’m not talking about fake relaxation, like when you go to get a pedicure, but you scroll on your phone and read work emails the whole time, or when you flop on to the couch at night and then ruminate on 15 different business decision in your head.
That’s not relaxation, y’all. Today’s episode is all about chilling the fuck out. Something most of us need to do a lot more. Getting deep, high-quality rest and relaxation is good for your nervous system. It’s good for your cardiovascular health. It’s definitely good for your business and income, and beyond all that, it’s good for your spirit and your life.
Because there’s more to life than work, no matter how fulfilling our work may be. Oh also, I recently learned a new term that I want to share with you, which pertains to this exact topic. And you’ll love that part. Once I share that part later in this episode, I think you’ll be nodding your head like, oh my god, that is totally me, I totally do that. Okay, onward with the episode. Here we go.
So, I’ve got a client who loves her work, which is beautiful of course. But the problem is she loves her work so much that she’s pulled to her computer like a moth to the flame. She struggles to set limits, she’s so excited and passionate about her projects that she just wants to go, go, go non-stop. It’s go time all the time, 365, 24/7.
The other day it was Saturday, and my client pulled out her laptop and started working away, and her husband came up to her and said, “Hey honey, please close the laptop, it’s the weekend. Put it away. If you start working right now, you’re going to disappear into that thing and I’ll lose you to that laptop all day.”
Can you relate to this? Maybe that’s you. You pull out your laptop or tablet or phone at the dinner table, in the car, in the bed, in the bathtub, on the toilet, nights, weekends, it never stops. You never allow yourself to fully unplug or fully relax. And this is actually a big, big problem.
Not only does it make your friends and kids and spouse really sad and hurt your relationships, but it actually slows you down and makes you a very inefficient worker. In the book that I’m obsessed with, Do Nothing by Celeste Headlee, she mentions the term time pollution.
Have you heard this term before? I hadn’t heard it until recently. Time pollution is exactly what it sounds like. It’s polluted time. It’s when work time is polluted with personal time and vice versa. It’s when you’re halfway listening to your kid as they tell you about their day at school, and you’re also halfway scrolling on your phone and reading emails.
Or you’re in your car with your partner and it’s the weekend, and you’re spending quality time together, except your mind is elsewhere and you’re thinking about invoices or clients or the proposal you need to finish writing on Monday.
Do you allow your time to get polluted? Sometimes, all the day, daily? I try to be disciplined about this, but I know I’ve got time pollution happening in my life for sure. Things are way better now than they used to be. I have better boundaries, but it’s really easy for the time pollution to sneakily happen.
It kind of seeps in like sewage. So the issue here, as you can probably guess is that when time pollution is happening, you’re just not 100% present and engaged in anything. You have a fragmented mind, half here, half there. In other words, you are distracted, and when you’re distracted, that means you don’t have your full brain power.
You write slower, you work slower, it’s harder to make smart decisions and get things done, which means a task that ought to take 10 minutes can take two hours. You’re putting your brain at a real disadvantage. You’re extending your workday much longer than it needs to be, and perhaps worst of all, you are bleaching the joy out of your day.
When you are distracted and not present in the moment, this is a very joyless existence. You see the sunset, but you don’t feel awe in your heart. You hear your child speaking, but you don’t really listen and feel the emotional connection. You’re not totally there.
And this, my friends, is why we all need to do better when it comes to boundaries around work and relaxation. When it’s time to work, work. Close the door, turn off your phone, bring your undivided attention. This will lead to your highest quality work at a faster speed than you normally go because you’re not bogged down by a million distractions.
When it’s time to relax, relax. Take all the work noise, the worries, the plans, the exciting projects, all of it, and set it aside. Don’t allow time pollution to rob you of your nights, weekends, vacations, weddings, anniversaries, birthdays, all the joys of life.
I’ll leave you with a little science. These stats come from an article published in Inc Magazine, written by a journalist named Tom Popomaronis. Working more than 40 hours a week is associated with increased alcohol and tobacco consumption and a much higher likelihood of depression, especially in women. Yikes.
People who work more than 10 hours a day are more likely to report relationship problems at home, and 60% more likely to develop cardiovascular issues too. Overworking literally hurts your heart in more ways than one.
And here’s the real kicker. Studies show that very little productive work occurs after 50 hours a week. So in other words, if you are grinding away at your desk for more than 40, 50 hours a week, not only is your health suffering, not only are your relationships suffering, but worst of all, you’re going to see a diminishing return on your time investment.
You’re not doing genius level work. You’re not in your creative flow state beyond 40, 50 hours. You’re doing low-quality work, busy work that gobbles time and doesn’t yield big results. And for all of these reasons and more, go take a real break. Relax for real. Do it for your business. Most of all, do it for your life.
It’s time for community wins. And this is the part of the show where I sometimes occasionally share wins and victories and accomplishments from clients and from members of the Rich Coach Club Facebook community.
And today, we’re doing things a little differently. So instead of focusing on accomplishment, we’re focusing on relaxation. And I went inside the Rich Coach Club Facebook group and I asked all the folks in there, what’s your favorite way to relax and whatever it is, have you done it this week?
Here are some relaxation ideas that people shared. Gabrielle shared that her new thing is microwaving small homemade eye compressions made with rice. Laying down for five minutes with those on her eyes and deep breathing. She’s done it one time a day at least and it’s good for dry eye and all the computer work.
Oh my gosh Gabrielle, I’m totally going to try this because all of the screen time and having my lights on and being on video has really caused a lot of dry eye for me. Sarah Magnoni says, “I’m going to go do my thing now. It’s a one-hour timeout with a Hallmark movie in her bed. No knocks or walk-ins allowed.” Oh my god, I love it.
Leslie says, “I’m easy. Netflix is all it takes for me to feel relaxed, and I relax a little each day.” Krista says, “Absolutely I do this every day. Candles lit, favorite coffee, and spaciousness. It might involve reading, writing, listening to something, or just staring at my Christmas tree.”
These are such great examples and all of them are free. Such a good list. So if you’re listening to this and you’re not yet a member of the Rich Coach Club Facebook group, get your booty in there. It’s free to join, you’ll get to hang out with a lot of cool fellow coaches from all around the world, share ideas, get inspired from one another, and I’m in there posting advice and tips every week too. We’re going to put the link in the show notes.
One more thing for today’s show. Throughout this episode, we’ve been talking about the importance of rest and relaxation. Do you remember how to relax? Do you remember how to play? How to have fun? How to experience joy? Hobbies, recreation, pleasure? Any of these words ring a bell?
I sometimes ask my clients to tell me their favorite ways to relax and they kind of stare at me slack-jawed, with glassy eyes and eventually say, “I honestly don’t know.”
So here’s a good thing to do. Get a sheet of paper and make a list of relaxation ideas. Even if you can only think of two or three things, great. That’s a start. And then in those moments, when you feel tempted to reach for your laptop or phone or email, or whatever, interrupt yourself and look at your relaxation list and do something from that list instead.
A couple of things that I love doing to relax include sitting on my patio and staring into space. I’m serious. I call it my patio of possibility. And just staring at the bushes, the birds, the sky, and literally doing nothing is so good for me.
I also love sitting in my favorite chair by the fireplace and reading a book, not a business-related book. It’s ideally a novel, something trashy, something that takes my mind in another direction.
And I love brewing a pot of tea. This is such a soothing ritual for me. I love to use my favorite teacups, favorite spoons, and really make it a special moment. And something else that I do to relax is stretch. The older I get, listen, I used to never stretch. I would run five miles, five days a week, never stretch. Terrible for your body.
The older I get, the more I love to get out a yoga mat and just do some stretches. So good. So I’ll be honest. 2020 has not exactly been a relaxing year for me. Probably not for you either. So I’m bringing more attention to relaxation and fun and joy because these are areas that have been neglected over 2020, and in our lives we all crave purpose, meaning, accomplishment. The feeling that we’re having an impact, that our lives matter.
But we can go overboard with purpose and impact. We can forget that work is not the only part of life that matters. Joy matters. Rest matters. Relaxation matters. Taking a quiet walk and holding someone’s hand and watching the sunrise or sunset or staring at the twinkly holiday lights and doing nothing, these moments matter too, so much. So let’s make more room to relax.
Thank you for listening to today’s episode. I hope this episode has inspired you to relax a lot more. And to notice those moments when time pollution is creeping into your life. Do something to address that. When you’re working, work. When you’re relaxing, relax.
Bring your whole self into whatever you’re doing. And this will lead to your best work, your best ideas, financial success, and also, an emotionally rich and joyful life. Have an amazing week and I’ll see you next time.
Okay, one last thing. It’s the end of 2020, which means it’s a great time to take stock of your year and do some assessments. Recently, I did a free presentation called Your Business Report Card. This was so fun, I gave everyone a blank report card to fill out at home and then we walked through each category. Things like leadership, marketing, finances, and more. And then you give yourself a score in each category to fill out your report card.
The goal here is to identify the areas where you are excelling in your life and business and areas that need attention. And I was actually super surprised to find that my lowest score as in the joy category. That is eye-opening for me and I am determined to bring more joy into my life in 2021.
So, if you missed the report card presentation, no worries. We have a replay for you. To watch, go to shyatt.com/reportcard. We’re going to put the link in the show notes so go check it out and I’ll catch you next time.