We received some questions about why we got married and what led to it, so I’m letting you into the backstory of how we met and got married. I’m also quizzing Scott on the things we’ve learned from each other, his thoughts on going down the entrepreneurial route versus going corporate, as well as some things we love about each other and are proud of the other for.
If you’re curious about marriage, business, and money, you’re going to love this episode. I’m so grateful to Scott for being honest and sharing his perspective on all of the above, and I hope you gain some useful tips for showing up for both your business and your relationships in a way that will help you create something incredibly strong and beautiful.
Welcome to the Rich Coach Club, the podcast that teaches you how to build your dream coaching practice and how to significantly increase your income. If you’re a coach and you’re determined to start making more money, this show is for you. I’m master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I’m psyched for you to join me on this journey.
I’ve been married to my husband Scott Hyatt, AKA the Silver Fox for over 27 years. Yes people, 27 years. That’s over 9500 days. That’s a whole lot of birthdays, Christmas trees, diapers, laundry, dinners, amazing times. Stressful times, arguments, financial changes, peaks and valleys. Oh my god, it’s just a lot.
We call our home the Hyatt Riot Crib because that’s exactly what it is. It’s a riot. Two very opinionated adults. That’s me and Scott. Plus, two equally opinionated kids who are now young adults pursuing college and careers, plus two dogs, one cat, one missing cat, and a whole lot of love and drama and insanity. There is never a dull moment in this house or in this marriage. I can tell you that.
And today, I’m bringing you the marriage episode. My special guest is my husband and we’re going to sit down – we are sitting down. We’re going to talk about what it’s like to have two entrepreneurs living under the same roof, the personal challenges we faced, the business challenges we faced, the worst decisions we made and the best, and how we’ve stayed in love. Stayed together, and kept our businesses rolling for two decades and beyond. Almost three decades.
If you’re curious about marriage, sex, love, parenting, business, money, or all of the above, you’re going to love this episode. So without further ado, let’s get into this.
Susan: Alright, hey everyone. Today’s episode is a little different. Instead of doing our pep talk segment like we usually do, we’re diving right into a conversation about marriage and business. My guest today is the one, the only Scott Hyatt. Welcome Scott.
Scott: Well, thank you Susan for inviting me to join your show. You did forget one important point. We have a grandpuppy now. His name is Caesar. Caesar is the cutest damn dog you’ve ever seen, but he’s a pain in the ass and thank god he only comes over for a couple hours at a time.
Susan: I mean, we haven’t even gotten started and you’re already bringing up the grandpuppy, which by the way, for those of you who don’t follow me on social media, you need to because I post pictures all the time. But I’ve already told the story about how we enrolled – Ryan enrolled – Caesar in puppy daycare.
And you were laying on the couch like, wait, what is this place? How many hours a day will he be there? I think I’m going to pick him up on my way home from work because he doesn’t need to be there the entire business day. I’m like, he’s not even a kid. This is not even your grandkid.
Scott: I mean, he’s a puppy.
Susan: Alright, so Mr. Hyatt.
Scott: Yes, Ms. Hyatt.
Susan: The first time you met me – why are you laughing? What was your first reaction?
Scott: I remember the moment distinctively. I worked at a place called Savannah Mall, Savannah, Georgia. And Susan walked in the door to the receptionist booth in the mall office. Came in just as pretty and as cute as can be. She put in an application, and when she left, I looked at the secretary and I looked right at her and said, “That’s what I want.”
Susan: That’s what I want. You know what I thought? Cute butt.
Scott: It’s true. I agree.
Susan: So what did you notice about me?
Scott: Oh, big blue eyes, pretty smile. She had that short pixie haircut at the time, which I thought was cute. I kind of liked it.
Susan: I’ll have to throw a picture in the show notes for y’all. So do you remember our very first date?
Scott: It depends on what you consider our first date. Now, there were actually – we’ve never done anything completely correctly. Call her up, pick her up. You got off work at the customer service booth.
Susan: Oh wait…
Scott: So was that a date? That’s the first question.
Susan: Wait, no. Let’s just get this out of the way. So Mr. Hyatt would come after I got this job as the customer service booth receptionist. He had taken another job in Hilton Head, South Carolina, and every Friday he was in the mall and would come by the customer service booth and flirt with me.
Scott: I would.
Susan: Do you remember?
Scott: Yes, I do distinctively.
Susan: And he suggested that we go down to TGI Fridays for appetizers because I was like, I don’t even know you, you could be a serial killer. And you were like, well, we could just split some appetizers and if you don’t like me, that’s it.
Scott: Smart move on my part. She liked me so I got a real date. So our first actual real date was – I lived in Hilton Head. I worked at a place on the island over there, and our first real date was at Harbor Town. So we went and had a nice dinner. In Harbor Town, there is a lighthouse, which is kind of cool and you get to go up on it and you look out over the marina. Very pretty area. We climbed the lighthouse and that’s where Susan gave me my first kiss, just so you know.
Susan: That’s right. You were a good kisser. I was like, I went home, told my mom that I met the man I was going to marry and I was 18. My mom was like what in the hell is happening?
Scott: What’s wrong with you?
Susan: Which leads me to a question submitted by a listener and they were like, you guys got married pretty young. They’re assuming we’re the same age, which we’re not. You guys got married pretty young, why, what led to that decision and why did marriage feel important? Why not just keep dating or living together while unmarried?
Scott: I can answer that one.
Susan: Okay, go ahead.
Scott: I’m going to start in reverse order. Why did we not live together? Well, one, her father said no. In fact…
Susan: My father said no.
Scott: Yes. Because remember, we literally – we dated for a year, then we got engaged, and we were engaged for a year and we got married.
Susan: Quit pounding on the table.
Scott: And you remember I got a new job and was being transferred to Maryland. And we didn’t live together because her father said we had to be married to leave the state. So the living together thing was kind of out of the question.
Susan: The way you tell this story is not accurate.
Scott: It is too accurate.
Scott: Okay, you tell the story.
Susan: No, go ahead, carry on, and then I’ll tell y’all the truth.
Scott: Right, her version is the truth. We can talk about the phone call she made and left on my voicemail when I had an apartment too.
Scott: That’s a whole ‘nother story. But anyway, back to this. Why did we get married? I wanted to be married. I wanted to marry Susan. I was at the age…
Susan: He’s nine and a half years older than me. So I was young and he was not.
Scott: Yes. It was the perfect union. We dated for a year; we were engaged for a year. I loved everything about her.
Susan: That’s so sweet. Okay, so here’s the deal. So we met when I was 18 years old. I had literally just graduated from high school. I mean like, the week before. So we lied to my parents about his age. I was like, oh my god, my parents are never going to let me date someone who is 27.
So they each had different ages. My mom thought you were 23 and she said we can’t tell your father he’s 23. Let’s tell your father he’s 21. So there are all these multiple ages. Anyway, it was so ridiculous. When we got engaged when I was 19, we were planning a wedding already.
And I said when Scott got a job promotion, I said I’m just going to go with him now, so it was April and the wedding was supposed to be in August. And my very Southern patriarchal father said young lady, you’re not leaving the state unless you’re married. And I was like, okay I’ll take care of that this freaking weekend. And we did. We went and eloped.
Susan: So obviously at 47 years old, I mean, I look back on that and I’m like, what was he going to do if I left the state and we lived together? Nothing.
Scott: It’s one of our best stories of our relationship is we’ve actually been married twice. We’ve been married in the state of South Carolina and we came back and got married in Savannah.
Susan: Back when I was a church goer. So to answer your question though, why did I want to get married? So I was totally head over heels in love. I was completely smitten and back then, I really bought into the idea that when you are in love, you get married.
Scott: Well, I still buy into that.
Susan: Well, so I mean, today when I have conversations with Cora and my son, it’s like, you don’t have to get married. You don’t.
Scott: See, there’s that disagreement thing coming out again.
Susan: Anyway, so we got married because we were in love and we subscribed to the societal conditioning that that’s what one does when they’re in love. Okay, here’s my next question. So Scott, when our kids were pretty young, I told you number one, I wanted to quit my job as a realtor and become a life coach. And number two, I needed a lot more help around the house with the kids. Look at his face already.
I was exhausted, I wanted more help with childcare, errands, carpool, cooking, everything. And basically, I wanted to make some big changes in our lives. And when I shared these things with you, were you freaked out? How did you feel? Be honest.
Scott: Oh, I’m supposed to answer now. Susan was very successful in – she did very well. So we had a good stream of income from her. My business was building but my income was going up. And all of a sudden, she wanted to quit that, which meant that that stream of income would go away.
We actually just bought a new house and she wanted to be a life coach. Well, I had never heard of what the hell a life coach was, so I was nervous, would be a good way to put it. You asked. That’s the answer.
Susan: Yeah. He was like, what the hell is a life coach? Do people pay for that? How in the world – I remember…
Scott: How do you make any money doing that?
Susan: Exactly. How in the world are you going to replace your real estate income with this business? He was like, what’s the business plan, what’s the business model. Do you remember you went and bought me Business Plan Pro?
Scott: I did.
Susan: He gave me the box and I’m like, what the…
Scott: She never did it by the way.
Susan: No. I wrote my Delta napkin business plan. And isn’t it hilarious that I refused to do that? First of all, Business Plan Pro, it was more like something you would do to present to a bank. It just wasn’t what I needed to be doing. But what’s interesting is now my entire business is teaching coaches how to create business plans, which is something I totally resisted doing in the beginning.
I had to figure out how to create it for the life coaching industry because creating a business plan for this kind of business I think is very unique and it’s not like a brick and mortar pizza shop or something. So anyway, now we’re going to talk about something people rarely talk about, which I have blogged about this before and you’re like, are you really putting that out there for people? So remember there was a time that I wanted to leave you.
Scott: I do, yeah.
Susan: And I was hell bent that Scott was the source of all my problems. And he was not.
Scott: In reality I was just the source of all of her joy.
Susan: Well really, you really weren’t the source of my problems. I was the source of my problems. But so we had agreed that we were going to work things out. And then I went and called a divorce attorney behind your back. Do you remember that story?
Scott: I do. I remember it distinctively because I was sitting in the attorney’s office.
Susan: So how about this? How about serendipity, god, the universe, whatever you want to call it taking over. So we had agreed we were going to work things out, and then I’m like, but this, not working shit out.
And I was sitting in my real estate office and I called who I considered to be who I had heard was the best divorce attorney in town. And I have this lovely phone consultation and then I hang up the phone and there you are. Standing in my doorway. Do you remember that?
Scott: I don’t remember that piece. But go ahead. That’s not the piece I was thinking about.
Susan: He was sitting in the lobby.
Scott: Oh yeah. Okay yeah, I’m with you. Yes.
Susan: He was sitting in the lobby of the attorney’s office and I called in and the receptionist said, “Jim Johnson, Susan Hyatt’s on line two.” And Scott was in that office having a meeting with a different attorney and he’s like, there’s only one reason Susan Hyatt would be calling Jim Johnson and you got up, right? You got up, left, drove whatever it was, five, seven minutes to my real estate office.
And so when I’m hanging up the phone, he’s like, so. No, you dragged me to counseling. He’s like, so responsible for the healing of my issues and our family. Good job, Scott Hyatt. So anyway, I thought it was the right option. I thought immediate relief from the burden of everything I was experiencing, I’m like, you know what, these kids can be with him every other weekend. I’ll have Wednesdays.
I was thinking I wanted relief from the burden of motherhood, this immediate we’re done, I need relief, we’re done. And instead, I learned how to advocate for myself and how to create a beautiful life and what I really wanted. So Scott Hyatt.
Scott: Do you ever stop and think that that’s maybe why a lot of people get divorced? That they don’t realize what the essence of the problem is and that they come up with a false narrative about it?
Susan: Well yeah. I mean, I think there are plenty of divorces that happen because people don’t want to do the deep work, but I also think people enter marriages for those wrong reasons as well. I remember Karen Leeder saying to me like, I was like, what if I do all this work and I still divorce him?
And she was like, listen, whether you stay with him or not, you need to do this work so you don’t carry this baggage into every relationship you enter. And so I definitely think that what happens is people aren’t willing to do the work. I also think people enter marriage are sold this fairytale notion of what marriage is. Like, marriage is work.
Scott: Well, I think anything in life that’s important is work.
Susan: Right. But I think people are sold the romantic notion of marriage.
Scott: That’s TV.
Susan: Right, but that’s what American romance is not based in reality. And then I also think – well I mean, we could do a whole episode on what I think about that. Okay, so let’s shift gears and talk about being an entrepreneur. So we’ve both been self-employed for a long time.
Scott: Self-employed for 20 years.
Susan: But you’ve been in commercial real estate your whole…
Scott: I’ve been in commercial real estate my entire life, since 1989.
Susan: Alright. So I have been an entrepreneur, so 13 years as a life coach and four-ish years as a realtor, so 17. So just three years less than you. Okay, alright, and a lot of people think that choosing an entrepreneurial path is too risky. And it’s safer to have a more traditional nine to five office or cubicle job. What are your thoughts on that?
Scott: First question, yeah, it’s absolutely safer to go get a corporate job. You get a paycheck every two weeks, you get health insurance, you have 401K plans, you get it all. But that’s it. That’s what you get. So there’s that. Now, is there greater risk in going into business? Sure, there is. Otherwise everybody would do it. But is there greater reward? And that’s really it.
Can you pursue what you’re passionate about? Yes. So that’s the difference. It is safer to be in corporate, but it’s sure as hell a lot more fun to be an entrepreneur and to create something, and to pursue your passions and to pursue your goals.
Susan: I think that’s a nice answer.
Scott: It’s a great answer.
Susan: It’s a great answer. I think anyone can learn how to build a successful business. I really do. For example, my COO Ana Micka is very – she has been an entrepreneur a lot of her career, but she’s what I would call an intrapreneur. She brings her entrepreneurial tendencies into my company.
And I think it depends on what you really want. I actually don’t believe corporate work is safer because I think it’s safer to you being in control of what you create, but anyway, there’s pros and cons to each, and it’s something that I teach. Build a tolerance for risk to be in business for yourself.
Because if you’re extraordinarily risk averse and if your top values are security, it’s not going to be a good values fit for you to be an entrepreneur. And that’s okay. Not everybody needs to be an entrepreneur. So Mr. Hyatt, what’s one lesson about business, marketing, or money that you’ve learned from me?
Scott: Business, marketing, or money, one lesson that I have learned from you. Money, spend it. Enjoy it.
Susan: Enjoy it, yeah.
Scott: On the marketing side, get your name out there. Be proactive.
Susan: Get your name out there y’all.
Scott: Get your name out there, be proactive.
Susan: Listen, what I’ve learned from you is when I first started this business, very early on, you would come home and be like, what did you do today? And I was working really hard all day long, but I was working on non-money-producing activities. And you would be like, at the top of your list, you need to be doing money-generating activities.
And that really changed the way I looked at – because I would spend all day making a newsletter pretty. And I was working, but is that a money-generating activity? Were there better things I could be doing to put cheeks in the seats? Yes. So I would say that’s the number one thing I learned from you. What are the money-generating activities you’re doing today? What’s something that I do that’s kind of annoying?
Scott: Spend money. What’s something you do that’s kind of annoying, oh, I know exactly what it is.
Scott: That phone is glued to her.
Susan: Oh, yeah. I am definitely…
Scott: She’s picked it up twice during this interview and looked at it.
Susan: Because my team keeps sending me shit.
Scott: Doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. The thing about phones is if you don’t answer it for 15 minutes, that message will still be there. And I can tell you without a doubt, drop your phone, set it down. There is nothing that important. Put it down for a while. There’s nothing that important.
Susan: What you do that’s annoying is talk to me about being glued to my phone. No. Not muting. Sounds. I’m a highly sensitive person so like, mute your freaking phone. He’s like, over there clickity-clacking at night when I’m trying to watch TV.
Scott: Audible confirmation that I did something correctly.
Susan: I’m going to audibly confirm something. Turn that off.
Scott: I turn it on. She yells at me. Every night.
Susan: Doesn’t learn. Okay, what are three things you love about me?
Scott: Three things I love about you. Boy, that’s going to require an awful lot of thought. Probably one of the most things I really love about Susan is her passion for what she does. She is actually very passionate and very much cares about her clients and the people she works for and works with. This was even in real estate. So much so, she bought a garage sale once.
Susan: Oh yeah. Forgot.
Scott: Not went to a garage sale. She bought the entire garage sale. We still have the piano if anyone wants one.
Susan: Right. We’re getting rid of that piano.
Scott: Number one, what do I love most about her? I love her attitude. I mean, she’s got a great attitude. I love that she’s smart, I love that she’s strong-willed, and she’s half-assedly funny.
Susan: Half-assedly funny.
Scott: Yeah, so those are the things I love about Susan. And you know, she works hard. I know there’s a lot of people out there that – how does she do all this? She works hard. I mean, my god, she’s up 4:45 every morning. So you guys wonder what the hell she’s doing? She works hard and she’s passionate about it.
Susan: You’re so sweet.
Scott: I am. But that’s true. I’m honest.
Susan: Alright, so three things I love about you. I would say just about the same. I remember when I was miserable in real estate, Scott’s passion is real estate. And I do have passion for real estate as an investor now, and it’s an amazing industry. It taught me how to promote myself.
But I remember looking at how he was so passionate about what he did and so excited to go to work and he knew that’s what he wanted to do in high school. And so I remember being like, how do you get some of that? How do you – because I never knew what I wanted to do really. Or I did know, but I didn’t let myself pursue it.
I was a journalism major. Remember that stupid English journalism teacher that told me I couldn’t write? And so I changed my major because I didn’t have the confidence at 18 that I have today. And I’m like, now look, I wanted to be a journalist, I have my own radio show, I have my own magazine, I have my own TV show. It’s like this full circle coming back into what I wanted to do.
But your passion, your tender heart, the story about picking up the puppy from puppy daycare because he doesn’t want him to be there all day. He’s like that about most things. And also, you spent seven years rebuilding a race car. Like, seven years holding a vision for something and painstakingly working on something like that.
Scott: I have the cuts to prove it.
Susan: Yeah you do. You do. Anyway, you’re a good egg. Alright, what was one moment where you felt really proud of me?
Scott: Publication of Bare, hands down. I mean, it was a major, major achievement. Very proud of her. It was a great book. It was promoted very well. It was a great endeavor. It was a great accomplishment.
Susan: You’re so sweet. One moment where I felt really proud of you, there are so many, but last night. I was so proud of you. So we are on this Go Time TV. If you haven’t started watching my YouTube show, Go Time TV, we’ll put the link in the show notes.
But we are on this RV trip and we drove all the way up to the Berkshires in Massachusetts to see my friend Robert Hartwell’s home that he just bought that he’s going to renovate. And we’ll put a link to the news story there about just this amazing project he’s working on. And we were out for a celebration dinner. We were at a COVID safe eating outdoors location.
And Robert started the conversation at dinner and was asking everyone what has COVID taught you, and everyone at the table had an answer. Mine was like, now I’m a gardener and that sort of stuff. And you know what Silver Fox said? Silver Fox said, “You know what, I’m changed because I am now a supporter of Black Lives Matter. I, as a white man, coming from a place of privilege, did not understand systematic racism and systematic oppression,” and went on and on and on about what he’s learned about Black Lives Matter.
And Nicky who was at the table was like, I really appreciate that because – or actually Robert said it. White men have a very hard time understanding white privilege and understanding male privilege and being able to verbalize that. So I was super proud of you.
Scott: I figured I was going to say something wrong when I brought it up. I really thought I was going to put my foot in my mouth.
Susan: Well, I mean, most of us don’t say it perfectly.
Scott: I probably didn’t.
Susan: Okay Scott Hyatt, where do you see yourself, your business, and our marriage in 10 years?
Scott: I already know the answer to that. I’m actually going to be retired in 10 years. I have full plans to do that. I won’t quit work completely but…
Susan: Listen, you’re not allowed to quit work because you cannot…
Scott: I have plenty of stuff to do, so I intend to travel with my wife.
Susan: Yes you do.
Scott: Maybe we’ll buy an RV.
Susan: Oh my god you guys, this RV trip.
Scott: I like the concept of an RV. It’ll be Go Time TV circumnavigates the United States. I don’t know.
Susan: I don’t know. I think we’re going to have to go West coast next.
Scott: Might be West coast trip.
Susan: Yeah. I definitely see us traveling a whole lot. I see for my business more books because I’m almost finished with the Bold book and I also see a Make a Scene book. And I’m excited to – being an empty nester is kind of fun.
Scott: It’s a lot of fun. I get to walk naked around the house. Literally not have a towel in our bathroom and walk naked across the hall to the linen closet and grab a towel and be very comfortable.
Susan: Just so y’all know, so number one, should we continue being entrepreneurs?
Scott: I don’t think anybody would hire us now.
Susan: Number two, should we stay married?
Scott: Without question.
Susan: Oh hey, today’s episode is nearly over, but before we go, here’s one more piece of my conversation with Scott. On a previous episode, I told a story about one Christmas early in our marriage, like 20 years ago, when we were so broke we couldn’t even afford a $35 Boy Scout lot Christmas tree. Remember that?
Fast forward a few decades and we’re in a very different financial position. We run profitable businesses, we own homes, we have investment properties, we’ve been able to support our children in attending colleges. And we just closed on some new real estate projects. A lot has changed in 20 years, right?
Alright, so Scott, if there’s someone out there listening right now, someone who’s in a really difficult financial position like we were years ago, feeling broke and stressed out, what advice would you give to that person? So your number one piece of financial or mindset advice.
Scott: Well, I don’t know that I can give you any great financial advice, but mindset advice is I’ve always thought you should follow your passion. If you follow your passion, you’re going to be successful. Money, yeah, everybody’s tight when they start out. But if you follow your passion, I really believe in a structured environment, get up, go to work.
Susan: Oh my god, you’re so cute. I would say my number one piece of advice is to not focus on the lack that you’re experiencing right now, but to ask the question like, how can I learn? Start with a thought like who knows more than I do about making money? And how can I learn to change this situation rather than focusing and spinning?
Because what got you there is not going to get you out of there. You’re going to have to learn something new and it starts with focusing on gratitude for what you do have and then asking the question, how can I learn how to create a different future?
Thank you for listening to today’s episode, which was a little different than our usual format. I hope you enjoyed meeting my amazing husband and hearing some of our behind the scenes stories. Scott, if you end up listening to this, thank you for agreeing to talk and to be honest and vulnerable and share your perspective on marriage, business, and more. I love you honey.
And to everyone listening, I’ll leave you with this. Please remember that your business, just like your relationship, requires daily care, daily nurturing love and attention. If you neglect your business or relationship, you’ll feel the consequences. But if you show up for your marriage and business consistently, with love, with generosity, with creative and a resourceful spirit, amazing things happen.
All of your daily efforts add up to create something incredibly strong and incredibly beautiful. Keep showing up.
Thank you for listening to Susan Hyatt’s Rich Coach Club. If you enjoyed today’s show, please head over to shyatt.com/cash where you’ll find my brand-new money magazine. Now listen, we designed this magazine to be entertaining, educational, and help you make serious bank.
So you can download the magazine, there’s a money quiz inside, there’s an interview with one of my favorite clients who went from making no money and being served eviction papers, to making over six figures in a very short amount of time. So the magazine includes that feature, lots of resources to help you do it, lots of resources about creating wealth and investing money.
It’s pretty robust, y’all. So head over to shyatt.com/cash to get that magazine. And you’ll also find a link to join my free Facebook community, especially for coaches called Rich Coach Club. So bring your coaching practice and your income to the next level at shyatt.com. See you next week.