Denise is an award-winning speaker, author and entrepreneur who helps women transform their Economy-Class money mindset into a First-Class life. Her best-selling books Lucky Bitch and Get Rich, Lucky Bitch give a fresh and funny road-map to create an outrageously successful life and business. Denise helps women release their fear of money, set premium prices for their services and take back control over their finances; she is the money mindset mentor for the new wave of online female entrepreneurs.
Ladies, let’s get to work on identifying and releasing these money blocks so that we can help even more people; the more money you make, the more you can give! I believe that 90% of the money that you make is determined by your mindset so grab a latte, snuggle into your comfy couch, and tune in to hear how to get started busting those mental blocks!
Welcome to the Rich Coach Club, the podcast that teaches you how to build your dream coaching practice and how to significantly increase your income. If you’re a coach and you’re determined to start making more money, this show is for you. I’m master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I’m psyched for you to join me on this journey. You’re listening to episode number three, here we go.
On last week’s episode, we talked about confidence because if you’re not confident about your work, if you’re not confident that you’re an effective and valuable coach, then it’s going to be really hard for you to sell your services and make money consistency. Lack of confidence is a major money block, but it’s not the only money block. There are plenty of other mental and emotional blocks that can get in your way, and when it comes to earning more money, we’ve got to nip this in the bud.
So for this episode, the big question is what’s your money block? We’ve all got one. Your biggest money block might be shaky confidence, or it might be something else, something totally different like a particular belief you have, a belief that you’ve carried around with you for a long ass time. Maybe it’s the belief that money is evil or that money makes things complicated. That’s a really popular one. Or that it’s just so hard to earn money or that you’re just not that good with money, or you don’t deserve to have more money, or that money isn’t important at all, or you just don’t have what it takes to be a successful business owner.
Maybe it’s a belief you inherited from your parents or your spouse or your grandparents. Maybe the belief isn’t actually true at all. It’s probably a belief that’s hindering you rather than helping. And so on today’s episode, we’re going to do some detective work. We’re going to identify one of your biggest money blocks, and once you recognize what it is, you can work on removing it. Hallelujah to that. And without further ado, it’s time for the segment that I call Your Two-Minute Pep Talk.
Okay peeps, here’s your two-minute pep talk for the week. And this is the part of the show where I share some motivation and encouragement and inspiration to get your week started off right in only 120 seconds or less and again, our primary focus today is figuring out what’s your biggest money block. And to start figuring that out, I have an exercise that I invite you to do.
So I created this little exercise after reading the book, Financial Recovery by Karen McCall. This is actually a pretty common exercise that many coaches use some rendition of to help their clients identify money blocks and limiting beliefs. And maybe you’ve done it in a slightly different format. This is my personal twist on it and this exercise takes like, one or two minutes. It’s really simple and quick but illuminating.
So what you do is get some paper, divide it into four sections like four squares, four rectangles, four circles, four hearts, whatever sections you want. And in the first section, please write down a small number. Maybe $20,000 or $40,000. This number represents an annual income level that feels pretty small to you. Maybe way too small. Definitely not enough to support the life that you want. And to be clear, it doesn’t have to literally be $20,000. For you, it might be $200,000 or $2 million. It’s whatever number feels too small, too tight, definitely not big enough for you.
In the second section, write down a bigger number. This number represents an annual income that feels pretty good to you. Not amazing, but fine, acceptable, decent. You could survive with this. And in the third section, write down a big number. This number represents you doubling or maybe tripling, quadrupling your current income. This number represents you doing pretty awesome. This number probably feels exciting and a little scary too.
And in the fourth section, write down a crazy big number. Maybe $1 million, $5 million, $10 million per year. This is probably way, way more than you’re currently earning. It’s a number that might feel almost incomprehensible right now, like another galaxy from here. So let’s recap. You’ve got a piece of paper, you’ve got four sections, you’ve got four numbers, a small number, an okay number, a big number, a crazy big number. And then sometime today or this week, when you’ve got a little time to breathe and sit quietly and scan your body and feel things out, I want you to write down how each number makes you feel.
When you imagine earning each one of those numbers, what are some of the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that pop into your head? Pay extra close attention, especially to the beliefs and write those down. For instance, maybe you imagine earning $750,000 a year, but immediately a belief pops into your head. Immediately, you think to yourself, “Well, $750,000 would be great but in order to earn that much money, I would need to hire a team, I would need to manage people, I would have people depending on me for their jobs. My business model would become just too complicated. I would be working non-stop, I would be so stressed, it would be just too much responsibility. More than I can handle that extra money just would not be worth that.”
Okay wow, that’s right from my head previously. It’s a whole lot of assumptions and beliefs all crowding into your mind and there’s a belief that 750K equals more stress, more complication, more busyness, more all kinds of things that you don’t want. That’s the belief that might pop into your head. But is that belief actually true? Are you sure it’s true? How can you know for sure? What if it’s not true? What if earning 750K per year would not necessarily lead to more stress and complication? What if it’s just a mental block? A block that’s false, that’s holding you back?
Interesting stuff, right? So here’s the dealio: I want you to do this exercise and I want you to notice the beliefs that arise in your head as you imagine earning various amounts of money. And just pay close attention to beliefs that seem to be negative, cynical, just very limiting even. And I want you to get curious about those beliefs. Ask yourself: why do I believe this? Where does this belief even come from? Is it actually even true? You’re a coach, you know how to do this type of investigation, so you probably do this kind of thought work with your clients all the time. So take your coaching skills and apply them to yourself. Investigate your beliefs. See if you can discover one of your biggest money blocks because I can guarantee, your biggest money block has nothing to do with your intelligence, your education, your credentials, or your circumstances.
Your biggest money block is inside your head. It’s not an iron barrier. It’s just a belief. And as a coach, you know better than anyone that beliefs are flexible. Beliefs can be changed, upgraded, old beliefs can be swapped out for new, better, healthier, more productive beliefs all the time. You can change your own mind and when you do, you’ll change your income. You’ve got this. You can do this. You have all the tools, all the skills, everything that’s needed to make this change. You’ve probably cleared other mental blocks out of your head in the past. You’ve done this work before and you can do it again. Hell yes, you can. And your bank account, #deposits, is going to say thank you.
Your pep talk for the week is complete. I hope you enjoyed the exercise I just described. If you didn’t do it yet, please do it soon. It’s a game changer. It’s a great way to discover your limiting beliefs around money. Look, we’ve all got beliefs that help us and beliefs that hold us back. Even after working as a coach for almost 12 years, I still discover crappy beliefs that hinder me. This is an ongoing thing. As you reach new levels with your coaching practice and your income, there will be different blocks for you to deal with at each level. Keep climbing, keep going.
And now, we’re moving into the part of the show where I give shoutouts to you. Shoutouts to listeners, clients, and all the wonderful people in my business community. Today, I want to give a shoutout to a woman in my Clear Coaches Community I call Fabulous Frankie. So let me tell you about Fabulous Frankie. I just featured her on a webinar, so if you want to watch the webinar replay, Get Clients Fast, you’ll see Frankie on there and you can learn more about her. But Frankie joined Clear Coaches and she set a goal to quit her corporate job within three months. So she wrote a pre-cap, which is recapping in advance. She wrote out that she would leave and how much money she was going to make. And right after she did that, a lot of stuff started happening and crumbling in her life.
Her daughter was diagnosed with cancer, I could go on and on. Frankie is a great example of someone who has persevered with tons of negative things happening around her. Traumatic things. And I’m happy to report that Frankie’s family is fine, and Frankie also is consistently earning $20,000 to $30,000 a month and she left her corporate job not within three months but within four because of everything that was happening, but she did it. So congratulations, Frankie. You are an inspiration to women in business everywhere. I’m so proud of you.
Okay, if you have something to say about this show, please email my team, post a five-star iTunes review about this show, or post something on social media and you might hear your name on a future episode. I love giving shoutouts to folks in my community, so holla at me. Thanks for your enthusiasm. I love you right back.
Now on to one of the most amazing interviews I’ve ever done. Are you comfy? Do you have a latte? Got your favorite pillow? Good. Because now we’re at the part of the show where you can relax, exhale, settle into the couch because it’s time for Denise Duffield-Thomas. Alright, if you don’t know Denise, she’s lovingly referred to as Denise D.T. She’s a money mindset mentor. She’s been coaching for seven years and she specializes in helping entrepreneurs remove money blocks. Perfect for today’s episode, right? She’s out to normalize wealth for women and you got to listen to this interview. It blew my mind on every level. I have so many questions for her, so let’s dive right in.
Susan: Welcome to the show, Denise D.T.
Denise: Thanks for having me. Oh my gosh, so excited.
Susan: I’m so excited because of course this show is called Susan Hyatt’s Rich Coach Club and when I think of rich and money, I always think of Denise Duffield-Thomas because you’re known as the Lucky Bitch. Get Rich, Lucky Bitch.
Denise: That’s right. And I love talking about money, and more people need to talk about money and I love that you do, and it’s really going to change the world if more women are just happier to talk about money. It’s not a taboo topic anymore. Not in our communities anyway, and if you don’t have anyone that you can talk to about money, you’ve got to get some girlfriends who do because it will change your life.
Susan: I agree wholeheartedly. I think that what’s interesting for me is in all of the coaching that I do, life coaches in particular, we’re an interesting bunch because we want to help serve and save the world, but many life coaches come into this profession from other helping professions and have this idea that if you are helping other people, if you’re serving the world, if you’re spiritual, then somehow money taints that, that money is somehow a negative thing and I know that you, like me, believe the opposite.
Denise: Absolutely. Well, the more people you help, the more money you make, the more money you make, the more people you can help. But I think that you really hit that on the head. The helping profession is probably the ones who struggle the most with money but yet, they’re the ones who can really change the world more than any others, and the worst thing is when you see someone who has such potential to help and transform people’s lives but they are stuck in a job they hate because they can’t charge people for what they do in their business, they’re undercharging so they’re totally burnt out and they can only help a few people, or they just feel massive guilt about charging anything at all, and it just really limits their potential to change people’s lives, and that’s the saddest thing. And when you think of the people in the world who do have money at the moment, they’re not changing the world for the better. We want to crowd those people out with people like in our community because we will use our money for good, but you need more good people to have money for the world to change in that way.
Susan: That’s such a beautiful way to think about it because honestly, on social media, some of the biggest debates I get in with other women is about money and this misconception that when I talk about money, when I celebrate money, that it’s somehow just a negative experience for them. And the examples that people bring up to me are people with money who are setting a bad example.
Denise: There’s tons of those, right?
Susan: Right? So like, billionaires who aren’t using their wealth to help the world. And so I do think it’s important for my audience to meet and I am sure all of them already know who you are but to meet and experience women like you, who your primary focus with your business is helping women remove money blocks.
Denise: Absolutely. And even for myself as an entrepreneur, the money is definitely great. I love making money, I love – we’re building a dream house. But the thing that really makes me passionate about money is being able to help other people with donations, with – like yesterday my best friend who works in the non-profit sector sent out an email and said our charities are really underfunded, who can help? And I was like, “Well, here’s $1000.” You know, like, that floats my boat so much and I know – and you and I both know this because we know a lot of wealthy women now. We give money away, we spend our money in ethical ways, we spend our money enriching our communities, and we spend money on other women and with other women. And that’s what we want the world to have more of. You know, like not people who buy an ostrich leather jacket – there’s nothing wrong with that. I know you like nice things too. But like, there’s just this new wave of rich women and it looks very different to what we kind of maybe grew up with thinking a rich woman was, and that’s up to us to do that. No one else is going to come along and redefine wealth because yeah, there’s a ton of greedy rich people out there. But that’s just going to continue if we keep ourselves small.
Susan: And I love what you just said because one of the questions I love to ask women around money is what’s something that doesn’t cost anything or cost very little that makes you feel rich?
Denise: Oh, that’s a great question. I mean, it’s not very little, but for me, I love the fact that I can buy the expensive tomatoes when I go to the grocery store. Like, that really makes me happy. You know, the fact that I don’t have to scrimp on that, and I look at my mom – you know, my mom was a single parent, very little money growing up and I see her go to the grocery store and she will buy – if she’s cooking dinner, she will buy one onion, one carrot, two potatoes, she will park really far away so she doesn’t have to pay any parking fees. She has to think about money in so many little ways, it’s just a habit for her. And I’m really thankful that I can support my mom. She doesn’t have to work. But it’s those little things that I notice that being poor takes up so much energy. Every aspect of your life because you have to think about every cent and every dollar. And I wouldn’t say that I’m a really – like I don’t spend money on very extravagant things. I actually have got pretty cheap taste, I have to say, but it’s the little things. I’m like, holy crap, I’m so glad I don’t have to walk 50 blocks just to save five bucks on parking. I’m so glad I don’t have to look at the prices of the tomatoes and buy one onion at a time. That stuff means so much more to me than the big stuff.
Susan: Right. You know, it’s interesting. I was joking with my husband the other day that a big luxury and something that makes me feel rich is grocery delivery. But on top of spending the whatever it is, $10 on grocery delivery, stocking the pantry with paper towels and toilet paper makes me feel so satisfied and rich and it’s such a little weird thing but there are so many delightful things that can make you feel rich that cost nothing or next to nothing that are just ordinary, and I think sort of encouraging people to get into that flow is a great first step. But I wanted to ask you, what do you think are some of the most common money blocks that life coach entrepreneurs in particular might experience?
Denise: Yes, so there’s two. So one we’ve already talked about, which is you can’t make money helping people. And I see this a lot, and this really pisses me off so much because people become life coaches because they want to help people but yet they feel like it’s greedy or unethical to make money doing that. One because it might be reflected back to you, you might have someone say, “Oh, you’re making money off people’s misery or off people’s problems,” and I’ve had people say that to me and I’m like, “No, I’m helping people.” But also, there’s a sense that if you’ve got a god given gift, especially if you are a life coach but you bring in some of the woo-woo aspects, maybe you help people with their intuition or you have some kind of woo superpowers, and you might be thinking, well, god gave me this gift, I shouldn’t charge for it. That’s unethical, it’s greedy, and I should be happy giving this away for free. And you will see this reflected back a lot because you might get people emailing you saying, “How dare you charge? How dare you ask for money?” And it could be like, I’m going to sell a $5 meditation. People go, “How dare you? It should be free.” So there’s a lot of stuff that’s drummed into us from a very young age as women. It’s better to give than receive, it’s better to share. There are suffering people in the world, you should be selfless. So that’s the biggest one that impacts life coaches. The other one though, which is very universal amongst – most people I know really, especially in the Western world, is you have to work really hard to make money. And this then permeates into so many different things that sabotage people’s businesses. They refuse to delegate because it doesn’t count if they’re not doing it. They sabotage themselves by reinventing the wheel every single time they do something. They’re like, “Oh, I can’t reuse my launch emails, I have to start from scratch,” or, “I need a brand-new website,” because it’s like, it’s not allowed to be easy, I’m not allowed to find shortcuts. Like, I have to put my blood, sweat, and tears into things and how many times have you heard people say, “Oh, I put my blood, sweat, and tears into my business,” it’s like, you don’t need to. Gross. But it really stops people from making money because they’re on this never-ending quest for perfection. It has to be perfect or I don’t deserve it. I have to have really suffered for this or I’m not worthy. I can’t take any shortcuts because then it’d be cheating and that would be greedy. So they’re the two that really stop people from making money. And not just making money but making money in an easy, joyful way.
Susan: And easy and joyful money making is something that I’m really excited that you model because you actually have – let’s talk a little bit about the books that you have out. The one that I have on my desk that has a beautiful new cover is Get Rich, Lucky Bitch, and Hay House just released that. So let’s talk about your books and let’s talk about the book that you’re working on now because it related to that money block that you have to work hard, you have to put your blood, sweat, and tears into it.
Denise: Oh, absolutely. So this is way back in 2012. I was like, I need to write a book. So I wrote a book called Lucky Bitch. I’ve actually got the original version because I’ve been doing edits, but I self-published. It was full of typos, full of – I wrote it half in British English, half in US English, which would have really annoyed people. And the year after, I wrote the money version of it, which was Get Rich, Lucky Bitch. So this was back in 2012 and you know, nobody selected me to write a book. I just decided to write one myself and there’s still sometimes people are very impressed by someone writing a book and I mean, it’s not easy, but it’s like if you can write a tweet or a blog post you can write a book, right? You just keep on going, as you know. But there’s still something about it that people go, “Oh my god, you wrote a book?” It’s kind of interesting. So I used that book to grow my business. I used that to get on stages and do interviews and grow my coaching business because that’s how I started out, doing one-to-one coaching. And it’s been a couple of years of manifesting a deal with Hay House, but last year we signed it. I revamped both of the books, new covers, new stories, things have changed a little bit, which we can talk about too in terms of money. When I wrote Get Rich, Lucky Bitch, it was kind of pre-Kardashian time, and things have shifted around money. I think people – there’s been a lot more conspicuous consumption and a lot more pressure for people to keep up with the Kardashians. So they needed to be updated and changed and then I pitched Hay House a third book, so I said, “Look, we’ll do a new book and you can have the others for free,” basically, and this one’s called Chillpreneur and this is about doing business in an easy way, finding your path of least resistance. I almost called it Lazy Bitch.
Susan: Oh my gosh, that’s epic. I want the Lazy Bitch version.
Denise: Well, it is kind of the Lazy Bitch version. And it’s not saying about being lazy, it’s just that whenever people let themselves off the hook around this perfectionism thing, we feel like we’re being lazy and it’s not the case at all. And I just want people to know that I’ve built a very successful $3 million business doing things in a very half-assed – or half-assed, I can’t say it in an American way – but consistently half-assed way.
Susan: I – wait, I am going to do a whole podcast episode where I invite you on and just have you try to do the American pronunciation. The American accent of all the words. Half-assed. I love it.
Denise: Half-assed. But yeah, it really doesn’t take perfectionism, and a lot of women, we’re just beating ourselves up constantly that we’re not perfect in business, that we’re just in a state of not enoughness all the time, which I know you talk about so much in terms of body and love and self-acceptance in that way, and we’re just constantly feeling like not good enough, not good enough, not good enough, and I know that very well. Every time I’ve done a successful launch or created something, there’s that little part of me that’s just like, no, move on, that wasn’t perfect, doesn’t count. And I really try to embrace this lazy chillpreneur vibe over the last couple of years. And the results are better.
Susan: This is so inspiring for me because one of the things that I talk about, I’m really out to disrupt hustle culture as well, and for years, I mean, for the past decade I’ve observed what I lovingly call Fun Fridays, and when I talk with my clients about listen, like – so Fun Friday basically means I’m working a four-day week unless there’s a retreat or something special, and my clients, many of them just cannot fathom not working seven days a week, much less four days a week and oh my gosh, Fun Friday, that’s great for you but the rest of the world doesn’t operate that way. And so it’s so refreshing for me to hear a super successful female entrepreneur like yourself, you know, multiple seven-figures saying, “Hey, guess what? When I relaxed and embraced the half-assedness, the lazy ass version of my business, it actually improved.”
Denise: It does, and you think how efficient women are, right? You reduce the amount of time you can spend on your business because you’re filling it with other things. You will get just as much done. Any mother who works part-time in corporate America or in corporate Australia knows this. You know, you reduce your working hours, you get just as much done as the full-timers. And I actually did this experiment recently where I was trying to do the edits on my book. I’m a terrible writer, by the way. I’ll write one paragraph and then I’ll spend four hours scrolling on Instagram. That’s how I write my books. One paragraph a day. So then I went, you know what, I’m going to the movies and I texted a friend, she’s also an entrepreneur and said, let’s go to the movies at 11:30 this morning and you know what, I got three pages done and then I went to the movies. So fill your life with things that you love. Your business will thrive. It absolutely will thrive.
Susan: I just love this so much and so let me ask you this: one of the stories that you write about that we’ve touched on a little but is how you self-published first and then you transitioned to being represented by Hay House and one of the things I’ve written about is how I self-published my first book but my second book Bare, that’s coming out in March, I did get an agent and I did get a publisher but it was – there was this – a whole process where I finally got an agent, I was so proud I had a real agent and then she was trying her best to line up meetings for me in New York, and she sent my book proposal out, I was going to be in New York anyway for something else, but I was sort of just counting on that there were going to be all these appointments lined up for me and no one was interested the first round. And I wrote this post about how you know what, I’m not waiting around for anyone anymore. I’m going to create a Bare digital program – I basically used the time to create a digital program and a membership community, and you wrote something similar about choosing yourself. So speak a little bit about that because I think it’s a compelling story about going from self-published to Hay House published.
Denise: Well, one of my first mentors, Karen Nola, she told me about this and she said that she used to volunteer for all these big personal development events in London, and she was just kind of waiting for someone to like, look at her and tap her on the shoulder and say, “You should be on stage.” And she wasn’t doing anything to do that, she was just hoping that someone would notice her potential, and that really stuck in my mind and that has for the last couple of years where I’m like, nobody is going to really shine a spotlight on you without you stepping forward. And when I first started my business, I was like, well, no one’s going to invite me on their stages. I’m going to do my own event. And this was only 2011, right? So it’s not the Stone age, but I was printing out posters and putting them on my community notice boards about my first goal setting workshops. And I would have four people in a room, six people in a room, 10 people in a room, and then it got slightly bigger after that. But it was like just if you want to be a writer, just write and self-publish. There are very little barriers to entry to that kind of thing. If you want to be a speaker, organize your own events, invite yourself. And the other thing that really stuck in my mind about this was – do you know Lara Rota?
Denise: She’s a wonderful entrepreneur and I remember she was on this like, 30 Under 30 entrepreneurs at the White House, and I was like, “Oh my god, Lara, how did you get that?” and she goes, “Denise, Obama isn’t sitting Googling who are the top 30 entrepreneurs under 30. I applied for this. I put myself forward for this.” And that blew my mind because I realized all these people who were winning awards and like, in magazines, they pitched themselves. They pitched themselves. And I was like – just blew my mind because I realized too that very few people do that. And so the chances of her getting on that list of 30 Under 30 was so much greater than say, winning a lottery randomly. Like, maybe a couple of hundred people applied and it just blew my mind to think, hardly anyone does that so you’ve got a way better chance of being selected if you just step forward and declare yourself that thing. And very few people will ever challenge you. Like when I self-published this crappy cover and everything, hardly anyone said, “Oh, you’re not a real writer.” They just believed me. I can’t believe people believe me that I’m a published author, and they’re like, but you do have a book and it’s on Amazon.
Susan: Yes, you are a published author, right? You are.
Denise: But I had to declare – and you know the very first thing that I did and it triggered the crap out of me – my email signature, when I first self-published it, I changed it to life coach and author. And like, I had to see that multiple, multiple times a day before I even started to believe it myself. But everyone else believed me. Every time someone got an email from me, they were like, “Oh, Denise is an author and a life coach,” and it was like, oh, am I? Yes I am. So yeah, that’s the whole lesson about choose yourself. No one’s going to do it for you.
Susan: Yes. Build your own stage, get your own castle, write your own book. I mean, I am such a proponent of this because you’re so right. I know – I was the same way, Denise. When I first started my practice, I remember looking around at people who were well known and just having this idea in my head that they had been tapped for greatness. Like, they had been discovered. And you know, I learned very quickly that your story about Lara is so profound because it’s like, no, they built their own stage, they applied, they pitched. And so for those of you listening, you know, if you get nothing else out of this podcast, please take that away, that you can create your own stage, you can create your own platform. I have a question. So for the coaches who may be listening to this who aren’t yet earning a lot of money, not as much as they would like, what’s your best advice to somebody who’s like, gosh, I just – I can’t seem to break through whatever it is, the five-figure mark, the six-figure mark, they want to make more but they don’t know what they’re doing wrong?
Denise: Oh my gosh, we can speak on this for hours.
Susan: I know, I know.
Denise: First of all, I say get my book, Get Rich, Lucky Bitch. It’s an easy read, it’s not scary. I hate numbers. I’m not an accountant, I’m not a financial advisor. Just a regular chick so it’s very easy to read, but there’s a couple of mistakes that I made. One is that I looked around my industry and I averaged out what I was going to charge based on what other people were charging, not realizing the collective money blocks that I was taking on from my peers.
Susan: Wow, wow, wow, wow, that just blew my mind. Okay, okay peeps. I have lots that I teach about pricing, but this little tidbit is going in there now. Say that again. You were looking around at what all your peers were charging…
Denise: Yes, and I averaged that out, not realizing that there are massive collective money blocks in that industry. So everyone’s got their own money blocks, right? So don’t take on other people’s as well. And I liken this to thinking, say you’ve got a backpack on and you carry your money blocks, all your shit around with you, all your insecurities. Just carry your own. Don’t carry everyone else’s because you have no idea what they based their pricing on. They could have had a mentor that told them that they weren’t allowed to charge a certain amount, they could have had a really misogynistic father who told them that they would never earn more than X. So you’ve got to stay in your own lane around that, and that’s the biggest mistake you can make is just averaging out. The other thing that’s very similar is crowd sourcing your pricing. And that’s when you actually – have you seen this in forums where people are like, “Guys, what should I charge for this?”
Denise: Don’t crowd source that because you’ll get the exact same problem. You’re crowd sourcing everyone else’s money problems. So that’s – they’re just two little pieces of advice. Both things that I’ve done. Not only did I crowd source advice from my peers or random people, I actually remember getting advice from my chiropractor about my business. He’d say, “I think you’re doing quite well with your business but I think you should change your business name. Lucky Bitch kind of implies that you think you’re better than everyone else,” and I was like, “Oh, you’re right.” 55-year-old white male chiropractor. Not even close to my target audience. But we just let other people impact our business and our life and your life is too important. You think of all the things you want to do with your business, helping people, but also, it’s okay to use your business as a vehicle to create your dream life and to buy that dream house that you want and to have a beautiful car and to help other people with your charitable donations, and you are literally just letting other people’s money blocks stay in the way of that. And one of my mentors, Kendall Summerhawk, she says, “Don’t let your net worth be impacted by other people’s self-worth.” It’s like, yes, that’s so true.
Susan: So well said, and oh my god, so many nuggets packed into just that last couple of minutes and I’ve done all of the above as well, so now I’m extraordinarily vigilant about who I accept business advice from because just like Brené Brown says, you know, that you only want to share your stories with people who’ve earned the right to hear them, so in terms of being vulnerable, making sure that you’re sharing those types of stories with people who create a safe space and I say the same for business and the same with success. You want to retain the right to share that with people who have earned the right to hear it and who have earned the right to contribute. So the 50-something white male chiropractor probably doesn’t make the cut anymore I guess, Denise?
Denise: No. No, absolutely not. And this is why it’s so important to hook in with a community, with a mentor who gets it because it’s really hard otherwise. You’re really going to believe the stories that other people tell you, and whereas if you’re on the other side and you see examples of success and real authentic beautiful women who are just like you, you know, that will help you to realize, “Hey, that can be me as well,” and it’s okay for me to be rich and nice, and rich and down to earth, and rich and ethical. But you have to see those examples for yourself because then you’ll believe it.
Susan: Absolutely. There’s a quote I love: if you can see it, you can be it. So for you, Denise, who do you look up to in that way where money is concerned?
Denise: Oh, that’s such a great question. You know, like, I’m an Oprah girl, I’m an Oprah baby, and when I met her in Sydney, I went to a VIP event and she said, “What have I taught you?” She said, “Why are you here? Why did you come?” and I was like, “It’s Oprah. You taught me to break the cycle. I watched you every day after school. You told me that I could be anything.” And she said, “Oh, I raised you.” And I was like, “Yes, you raised me.” You know, it’s like, yes. And Oprah doesn’t talk a lot about money really. She doesn’t talk a lot about money and I’ve heard her say too she doesn’t really have any things about money. She kind of earned great money starting out but I think one person for me, Ali Brown. I remember she said that she was a millionaire by 35 and I was like, “That’s it, I’m going to be a millionaire by 35 because Ali did it. If Ali could do it, maybe I can do it.” And I did because she showed me the way. And then, you know, I don’t – I didn’t know very many people with money growing up at all, but one book that really impacted me too was The Millionaire Next Door. I think Thomas Stanley maybe is the author of that, but that made me realize, “Oh, I don’t have to look like what a rich person on TV looks like. I can wear my cut-off jeans and my flip-flops.” We call them thongs in Australia.
Susan: You can wear those too.
Denise: Yes. You know, it was like, I’m allowed to be me and to be wealthy. I don’t have to change myself, and you teach this as well. It’s like, when you accept yourself the way you are, that’s when you paradoxically get everything you want, and it’s the same with money. When you realize, oh hang on, I don’t have to change anything about myself, maybe I can be wealthy how I am, that’s when you really start to allow the abundance to come in because you’re not blocking it going, “Come back when I’m perfect.”
Susan: Right. I’m not ready for you yet because I don’t have a mink. Like, Dynasty – Alexis on Dynasty.
So of course, in the show notes we’re going to have all the information about how people can order your book and find you, but where do you hang out, Denise D.T.? Where can everybody go to get more goodness from you?
Denise: Well, Instagram I think is my place of choice at the moment, and I’m @denisedt. I post a lot of pictures of my kids.
Susan: Oh my gosh, they’re so adorable. Mom of three little ones now and running this successful business. It’s so inspiring.
Denise: Oh, and I work with my hubby as well, so things are a bit craycray around here sometimes. But yeah, I’m on Instagram and I would love, love, love if you take a snapshot of your artwork of the podcast you’re listening to, like of the episode with me and Susan, tag us both and tell us an a-ha from this podcast. Tell us any like, a-ha that maybe you’ve been sabotaging yourself, because we’ve all done it. Don’t worry. And just tag me @denisedt, and especially if you read my book too, as you’re reading it tag me because I love hearing from people who are just getting those little a-has all over the place. It’s great.
Susan: Well, I have gotten so many a-has just listening to you here in this brief interview, so I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are a great money mentor to so many, and me included, and I so appreciate your time. Thank you
Denise: Thank you, thanks, everybody.
What a powerful interview. I love Denise D.T. so much and her books stay by my bedside table. Remember, the big question of today’s episode is what’s your biggest money block? I want to give you one more little nugget before we wrap up today’s show. Just a quick story.
Many years ago, back when I’d been coaching for maybe two or three years, I was doing some research online and I discovered a guy who’s a life coach just like me. He got certified the same year that I did, he lived in the same area as me, his business model was very similar to mine. His credentials were very similar to mine. On paper, just about everything was identical about our coaching practices, and yet, he was charging twice as much money per hour as I was. I showed his website to a friend of mine and I said, “Look at this guy. I wonder how he’s able to charge that while I’m charging so much less.” And my friend looked at me and she said, “Susan, I’m sure you’re just as good of a coach as this guy. I mean, who knows? Maybe you’re even better than him. The only reason he’s able to charge twice as much as you is because he believes he’s worth it.”
My friend’s words really stuck with me because she was totally right. He charges more and he gets more because he believes that he’s worth more. Ultimately, it’s all about your confidence, conviction, and belief in yourself and your skills. I would argue 90% of the money that you make is determined by your mindset. Your wealth starts in your mind.
Okay, that’s a wrap for today’s episode. Your action step for this week is to start identifying your biggest money blocks, and once you identify those blocks, these are limiting beliefs, then you can start to dissolve them. It all starts with awareness. You can’t dissolve a mental block if you don’t even know what it is. So start by discovering your personal blocks. This is important stuff. This is how you’re going to take your coaching practice and your income to the next level. It all starts inside your mind.
Alright, thank you so much listening to Susan Hyatt’s Rich Coach Club. If you enjoyed today’s show, please head over to shyatt.com/rich where you’ll find a free worksheet with audio called 3 Things You Can Do Right Now To Get More Clients. You can download the worksheet and the audio, print it out, there’s a fun checklist for you to check off. Just three things to do. Check, check, checkidy-check.
This worksheet makes finding clients feel so much simpler and not so scary. So head to shyatt.com/rich to get that worksheet. Over there, you’re also going to find a free Facebook you can join especially for coaches. Bring your coaching practice and your income to the next level at shyatt.com. See you next week.